I feel like this past week has been a pretty low for me...and there's no one to even tell.  I don't even know if I wanna talk about what has been going on in my brain because it seems so trivial, yet I know it's because of something significant that happened.  To put it simply, people press my buttons and I go haywire.  I hate the way people treat me.  Before I would keep it in...but when it's your family member treating you like shit, you should be able to confront them.  And I did it in an immature way to let her get a taste of her own medicine.  She's PMSing, no doubt about that at all.  I didn't even need to see the pads in the bathroom (which I did end up seeing anyway).  My choice of words obviously aren't something a little kid should hear.  I could've done much more damage, but that would be so evil.  Sometimes I do feel evil though.  It's like provoking a sleeping tiger -- there's no way to control what will happen next.  And I went kinda crazy, I do admit.  But I decided several days ago that I wasn't gonna let her get away with talking to me that way again.  And when I walked into the house seeing her, I didn't plan on speaking with her.  When she said those same words to me she just did earlier this week when I saw her, I blew up.

God...I'm so full of disappointment, anger, sorrow, strong dislike in my life right now.  So tired of living this life I'm living.  I want something greater than this -- something more meaningful...with people that are worth it.

Sometimes I feel like people are just full of shit.  Everyone is to an extent.  No one's perfect anyways.  And that's what gets to me.  I WISH there was someone that WAS perfect.  I don't know why...maybe so I know there's one person that is only full of good.

But there's not such a person.  I'm just setting myself up for disappointment.